By this time I thought I'd have run out of things to say. I never thought I'd make it this far. The summer was so close and school was going to be getting out in just a couple of weeks. Over and over again I had thought about it and wasn't sure what to do. First I had thought it would be better to break it off, just realize I had fun but cut the losses. That way I could spend the summer with my friends and go off to college with a blast. Then I thought that I could be giving up one of the greatest things in my life. I wasn't doubtful, but just didn't want to stretch the good thing I had out any longer than was possible.

School was closer to letting out and there wasn't much left work to do so I couldn't help but think about it more. What was I to do, stay with her and spend less time with my life long friends, or end something that had only been going on for a few months?

By the time school let out I still hadn't made a decision. A week of summer went by with all the normal activities going on. Her and I were having a good time going out to the movies and what have you. Finally, I asked her how she felt about us. I couldn't believe it, but I told her what I had been thinking about. We talked about it some, but finally I said I wished to forget about this and just continue on. She told me she felt there wasn't a reason to stop something that was still going fine. That seemed right, but there was still something weary about the whole thing. I dropped it though, and as much as I could of the attitude.

Depending on our friends there were times of us just sitting around her house. Some times we were waiting for something to go on, others because we didn't want to do anything else but be with each other. We went swimming for a while and then went into the air conditioning and watched some movies up until the afternoon. What would summer be without ice cream. We went out that night and got some ice cream and then went out and met up with some of her friends. Oddly enough, after the ice cream when we went out with her friends we went out to eat. We went to a family restaurant type place and got soups, salads, and bread. Iced tea and cola's to drink. We sat in the booth talking and crunching on our summer salads, fresh and crisp. The booth was next to a window and it was dark outside with all the street and store lights outside twinkling about the same as the stars. It wasn't like the two of them were trying to outshow each other, but instead coming together for a dazzling scene no matter where you looked.

The summer went on and things went alright. The two of us had good times together, but we had our times apart to spend with our friends. Although usually I would often think of what was going to happen in the future we didn't talk about it at all. And being with her kind of helped me to forget that I would normally worry about it.

Even though there was sure to be plenty of good things in the future this summer was special. It went by and we failed to see how far it had gotten. In a way it was like time was running out. There were so many things to do this summer and still things left. In just a few weeks I would be leaving.

Then finally the day came. Most of my friends had already gone, which was good in a way because now I could focus any remaining time on her. I didn't know what this day would hold or how it would turn out. We didn't make any special plans and just thought to play it by ear.

It was weird, but we didn't do much other than sit around. We talked and sat around and that was good enough, nothing to go out for and not enough time to start on anything we hadn't done yet. The day was beautiful with a blue sky with big white fluffy clouds, a great day to go out, but all I wanted was to sit with her and have her hold me. And I got to do that for a while. I was scared about what was going to happen and how going and being without her would affect me. But she held me.

I ended up staying until sundown. The orange sun setting in the sky. I tried not to let go of her. I should have let go of her 4 hours ago. It was already 6 pm and I should have been on my way. We stood out in the driveway prolonging the goodbye's. Standing sometimes not even daring to speak but just looking at each other. I told her it really was time for me to go and I began to hug her. Into my ear I heard her say "I love you." I didn't have to hesitate or even think about it, I just uttered them right back at her.

It was a hug to last a lifetime, but within a few minutes I pulled back to smile at her only to see tears on her face. I could feel the emotion swelling up in my face. I kept smiling and rested the palm of my hand on her cheek and rubbed away the tears with my thumb. I started to cry a little bit too. People say a lot of things with a lack of feeling and it's possible to see right through that. I tried to assure her that it would be ok. My words were thicker than stone. I pulled her back in for another tight squeeze and then told her I had to go now. She said she knew, we both knew, but that's not what we wanted. But I couldn't think of a better way of leaving it. I got in my car and watched her wave goodbye. As I drove away I looked up at the sky and knew it would never be the same.